That Type of Person

Have you ever seen a film named Crash? If you haven't, it's really a must see. Basically it highlights how people react to situations based on stereotypes, how they are created and how they are broken. Believe it or not, you have stereotypes in your mind, and they affect everything you see, read and hear.

I have a problem with stereotypes, because I tend to 'prepare' myself for what people might do based on a preconceived idea I have of them. While I don't think of myself as someone who judges people, I have experience with types of people, and I 'brace' myself for what they are going to say or do based on what type of person I think they are. Now, I have been proven wrong on a number of occasions, but most of the time I'm right. That's why it's a stereotype.

Here's an example. You may not know Facebook, but it's an application where you can meet and network with business associates, friends or family, or just express your ideas and preferences online. Part of the application entails you detailing 'what you are doing right now' in a box called 'Status'. From this people can see what you are thinking, experiencing or just want to say at any stage.

Now, as soon as I see a girl putting things in her status that have to do with glorifying God I immediately see them as a shallow, frivolous person whose lives are in a permanent state of panic. I hate it. I'm all for people giving glory to the Father, but when they do it with Facebook I feel that it cheapens the experience because you can't fully explain what happened. And in my experience the people who put these types of things in their status are people who live in constant fear, without control of their lives, hoping that God will guide them to what they should eat for lunch today.

At the same time you can look at a guy with long hair and immediately see him as a dirty and forward person who probably listens to heavy metal and can barely string three sentences together. Now, some of the time the stereotype is going to ring true, some of the time you will be wrong and some of the time the truth is a mixture of the two.

This isn't a problem if you can choose to look past these stereotypes and actually get to know the person, but in my case, and almost entirely when it comes to potential girlfriends, this is mostly impossible because I write the woman off before I've even said hello.

You see, I'm an analyst. I love to analyse anything and everything from the word go, and it affects my perception of people. And for me it's a problem because as a result of this, directly or indirectly, I've never had a girlfriend because all the girls I've ever gotten to know I've written off before I really knew them.

And now I'm scared, because even if I did like a girl I wouldn't actually know how to approach it without coming on too strong, or alienating the person, I wouldn't know how to read the 'signs', assuming there are any and I wouldn't know how to look past the things I see immediately. I don't know.

The other thing of course is that I could spend all day finding excuses as to why I can't do anything right now: I don't know if I'll have to move for work, I'm currently broke because I don't have a job, stress at home and about a thousand other reasons.

I guess in this case, the first thing to do is to choose to look past the stereotype, and then to take a risk. I'll probably get burned a few times and make quite a few mistakes, but I'll just have to wing it. At the end of the day the timing isn't going to be perfect, and neither am I so it's all a risk really.

I guess it's time I broke some of my stereotypes...